Sandy, Trude and Evie
Sandy, a widow in her late 50s, lost her son Adam to cancer in the middle of 2010. Before his death Adam had lived happily with his girlfriend Trude and their six month-old baby Evie.
Sandy enjoyed looking after Evie as often as she could, and her help and support was needed more than ever when Adam was ill.
Following Adam’s death, Trude returned to her home town with Evie, some 300 miles away from Sandy. In her grief, Trude felt unable to return Sandy’s calls or make arrangements to see her.
As a result Sandy lost touch with Evie, which compounded her grief. She found it unbearable to think of Evie losing another family member who she had bonded with, so soon after losing her father. Sandy felt rejected by Trude and was afraid to keep contacting her.
By now, Trude was wondering why Sandy had lost touch, feeling she had let her down. Trude became more isolated in her own grief.
Not knowing where else to turn and reluctant to take the drastic step of court action, Sandy contacted National Family Mediation (NFM). After discussing the situation the mediator suggested that NFM send a letter to Trude setting out the potential benefits of mediation, stressing its voluntary nature, to see if this would help to re-establish contact between Sandy and Evie.
On receipt of the letter, Trude contacted NFM immediately and after being reassured by a trained member of staff about the voluntary and conciliatory nature of mediation, Trude said that Sandy could call her any time. Sandy, Trude and Evie were reunited within two weeks of contacting NFM.
This is a real case study from our trained mediators, though names have been changed to protect identities
Next case study: Read about Karen and Stephen
To find your nearest professional NFM mediator enter your postcode here